Toddler Talk Tuesday: I’m Gonna Need My Sewing Kit, Won’t I?

I’m pretty sure I swore about three times over that I was done with bathroom humor, but how realistic was that? Not at all, since I have quite a ham for a four-year-old. Also, it’s just funny, right? We all need a good laugh on a Tuesday, I think.

Bathroom humor ...

(I’m sorry … sometimes I just can’t help myself….)

I got this gem yesterday when Squish was on the toilet doing #2. She’s not wiping her butt yet, so it’s my daily pleasure to wipe not one, not two, but three poopy butts. Hurray for me, right? Anyway, I had just popped into the bathroom to see if she was ready for my help …

Me: “Are you done pooping?”

Squish: “No, I have one more little poop to come out. Right now my butt is thinking.”

That is kind of the best expression I’ve heard lately for your body not working quickly. Getting out of bed slowly in the morning? “My legs are thinking.” Not getting your meal in fast enough? “My mouth is thinking.” This kid is good with the one-liners!

The second quote epitomizes the volume of Squish’s toots. You’d swear a teenage boy was around when she gets … windy. Hurricane-y? Yikes.

[Squish tooted super loud.]
Me: “Do you have a hole in your pants?”

Squish: “Yes, I need to sew them up.”

I wouldn’t be surprised if I actually had to….

*   *   *

Do you read the blog Baby Costs Money yet? You should – it’s 100% unique (she chronicles the costs of raising her child after reading it costs around $250,000 to raise a child in America), very funny, and equally endearing. She features a fellow mommy blogger every other Monday, and yesterday’s mommy was me! Read her feature piece of Welcome To The Nursery here.

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